I
recently watched a talk on the ‘Stanford Graduate School of Business’ YouTube
channel and Oprah Winfrey was being interviewed. One of the things that struck
me the most about was a statement she once said:
“I've talked to nearly 30,000 people on this show, and
all 30,000 people had one thing in common: They all wanted validation… I would
tell you that every single person you will ever meet shares that common desire”
This
got me thinking, why do we seek validation from others so much? In this society
we’re almost conditioned to make our decisions based on the approval of another
human being. We give other humans the power to belittle our own judgements, and
we live our lives trying to be liked by people. The craving of wanting to feel
important and have positive reinforcement from others seems to almost be a
basic instinct in us. Therefore we are ruining our inner selves, we change the
way we dress, talk, think just to please our families, friends, partners, and
social communities, we have to ask ourselves is this worth it? Personally I've accepted the person I am, I can live without drinking, I don’t smoke, don’t do
drugs, I don’t even enjoying clubbing that much and yet the typical stereotype
for people my age is to engage in all of those activities. In the past I've been called “boring” or that I'm “living the life of a 30 year old”, but to me I'm happy, I don’t seek to please other people by making myself miserable, I'm comfortable enough in myself to enjoy my own company and to get on with life
how I want to live it.
Who are
you? Are you the person you want to be or the person you’re being told to be?
It may sound cliché but you do only live once, find your voice it may take time
but that’s the voice that truly knows who you are. Truth is not everyone
actually cares what you do and the people who belittle what you believe in or
knock down your confidence are the people who are toxic in your life and you
don’t need that around you. As long as what you’re doing isn't harming anyone
else and is ethical, be you! Live your life how to want to and don’t change
your opinions based someone else’s opinion.
“A truly strong person does not need the approval of
others any more than a lion needs the approval of sheep.”
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